HarryShearer.com

Emma Lazarus’ poem is old and stale. The President, with his oxymoronic “permanent pause” on Third World immigration to the U.S., has gone the extra half-mile and revised and improved that musty verse. I’ve gotten an exclusive copy:

“Save your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to mess up our streets
The wretched refuse needs a mighty garbage truck.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to the folks at ICE
I turned off my lamp and closed the golden door! Although I would like a Golden Door.”